Moses:
Dear family and friends,
We have all come together here today to not only mourn our father’s passing, but most importantly, to celebrate his life.
Our grandparents were blessed with Dad during the tumultuous era of the Japanese occupation. As the eldest surviving child, he cared for each and every one of his brothers and sisters who followed after. He was their Tai Kor, Dai Lou, and then when their children came along he was the Tai Pak, Tai Kiu.
Being Dad’s eldest, Dad made sure that I was able to read very early. I think before the age of four, I could read quite fluently. And my first day in kindergarten, in Lai Meng school, I remember he nudged me to mingle and make friends. He even broke the ice for me with an awkward American boy in my class. I still remember his Chinese name was Yew Shi Sen. We became fast friends.
It became clear to me then that Dad was really good at making friends. I’d like to think that, or at least I hope that, I got that from him.
Crispi:
As his daughter and youngest, the most important thing he taught me was how to drive without killing everyone in the car. He also served as a role model to me for how to control my temper, and how to be patient and forgiving with my loved ones.
Dad was a good husband, and he and Mom were life-long partners and companions. Together they brought humor, warmth and laughter at any gathering with friends and family.
Moses:
Dad was involved not just in his wife’s and children’s lives, but also in his brothers’, sisters’, nieces’ and nephews’, and even cousins’ and cousin’s children’s lives. He really embraced his role as the eldest of the family seriously and looked out for everyone, because to him, they were all his family.
As a child I have memories of most of my aunties and uncles on both mom and dad’s sides living in our house at one time or another. He always generously and lovingly provided a springboard from which they could launch their own lives.
If Dad’s first priority was family, his next love was feeding them. He loved it whenever family came to stay or visit because it gave him an excuse to go out and buy breakfast, or buy supper, or make super sweet and creamy coffee. I am sure many of you are familiar with this – because this love of buying breakfast or supper extended to his friends as well. There was nothing he loved better than to go out and buy Hokkien Mee or Yeen Yeong or just an assortment of baos around 10 o’clock at night. It was been SUCH a hard habit to break but how can you fault him for that. It was just one of his favorite ways to show his love.
Crispi:
Dad’s other big trademark was his love for good music – especially good music that involved great, singable melodies sung by beautiful voices. I will always think of Dad whenever I listen to Whitney Houston, and remember how Dad described Barbra Streisand as the ugliest woman in the world with the most beautiful voice in the world.
Of course, he loved even more songs that he could belt along with – “Moon River” (Andy Williams-style), or “Am I That Easy to Forget” (Jim Reeves-style)… We have all heard his voice floating out in church or whenever a good song came over the airwaves. I will always be reminded of him when I hear: “O Niiiiiiight Diviiiiine…”
Dad was not just loving with his family. He was also generous to his friends. When I first shared the news of his passing with Aunty Jeannie, she told me a funny story. Her daughter Delina had had appendix surgery while her father was out-of-town. Dad brought his checkbook to the hospital, prepared to pay the bill because “they won’t discharge Delina if you don’t pay the bill!” Aunty Jeannie had to reassure him they had insurance and they would not hold Delina hostage.
Moses:
We didn’t expect to part from you so soon, Dad, but after almost four months of fighting incessant lung infections, of not being able to partake of your favorite FOODs, you deserve a good, long rest. We hope that now, you can have as much sweet coffee, char siew, kew nyuk, and char kuey tiao as you like. I will remember you whenever I welcome guests – I will welcome them in your spirit, Dad. Every time I go buy someone breakfast or supper I will think of you.
Crispi:
Every time I belt a tune – I will also be singing it for you. Every time I drive, I will remember all the lessons you taught me.
And most of all, we will do our best to model your love, patience and generosity for your family and your friends.